a beautiful video from monday9am.tv

are you taking notice?

Okay, so I stumbled across this video by accident and know you will enjoy watching this.

A bunch of stuff you - thought - you knew about history….. WRONG!

Take a history teacher, add a stand up comedian, sprinkle an accomplished actor on top and you get

Robert Wuhl in “Assume the position!” This is an actual HBO special.

Warning:  this is an HBO special so it contains some graphic language.

If nothing else this is food for thought…

Enjoy!!!

History can be FUN!

by Bruce Reinhardt

So my ex wife gives me a call one Thursday afternoon, all upset and teary, blaming me for: our failed marriage, her crummy car, her tomato plants dying, her gray hair, AND the fact that our 12-year-old daughter had just been caught shoplifting.

“What was that last part?” I asked. “Gray hair!” she sobs. “No, no, no…the Erica shoplifting part,” I clarified, and then I pressed further with, “And when exactly did this happen?” Suddenly, I was experiencing flashbacks of being married to my ex, and how frustrating it always was whenever I tried to pin her down on REAL facts versus a bunch of unrelated “feeeeeeeeelings.”

“It just happened. Right now! And she’s still at the store, and she’s being held there until the Sheriff comes!” More crying. “Okay, okay, now are you going to tell me what store she’s at, and do you have a phone number, or the name of whoever is holding her there?” “What do you mean ‘O.K.’!?” she hurls. “If it weren’t for you, none of this would have happened. If you hadn’t divorced me, Erica wouldn’t have been caught stealing!” Huh? More sobbing.

After several of these mindless exchanges, I finally extract the phone number of the department store where my criminal daughter is. I manage to get through to customer service, and am promptly put on hold as I’m being patched through to the security office. But fairly soon, on the other end of the line I hear, “Bruce, I just got here and Erica’s all right…she’s pretty shook up…I’ll wait for you.” “Gee, that’s pretty weird,” I thought, “this guy’s acting like he knows me.”

As I’m driving to the store, all these pictures pop into my head of my little Erica, handcuffed to a metal table, with a spotlight shining in her eyes. I envision tough-looking, uniformed cops, towering over her as they proceed with their interrogation that goes something like, “We know you’re the leader of this shoplifting ring that we’ve been having so much trouble with. You’re headed to the big house, little girl, and you’ll probably be doing five to ten for robbery.”

When I pulled into the parking lot at the mall, I noticed the Sheriff’s car sitting there, and so I parked right next to it. I go inside the store and ask the customer service lady where they keep the shoplifters. She calls security and they escort me to an office with nice overstuffed chairs, one of which has Erica in it. She definitely looked guilty and scared to death, but I still couldn’t see her having to get a mug shot taken. Then I turn and notice the Sheriff. And wouldn’t you know it’s Jim Wheeler, my ex brother-in-law! Of course, I just figured that he never was very fond of me, especially when I divorced his sister-in-law; and, I’m sure he got a one-sided version of what a scumbag I was.

“Hiya, Jim!” I blurted out. “What’s happened here, and what can I do to help Erica?”

Well, it turned out that Erica had been dared (i.e. suckered) by a couple of her classmates to steal some lipstick and a tank top. Naturally, my not-so-deviant daughter got caught red-handed, and the other two thieves ran without a thought of covering Erica’s back.

After a bit of serious briefing, on matters of the law and so forth, I was relieved to learn that Sheriff Jim didn’t really think I was a scumbag after all. In fact, he told me that he had actually wondered how the hell I had ever put up with his sister-in-law.

For Erica, the scare of getting caught was clearly enough to set her straight, and the store dropped all of the charges against her.

Thankfully, I never got another call from the law about more shoplifting, but I sure wish I could say that I never got another call from my ex. I swear, every time a gray hair sprang out of her head, she was going to sue me. But if you can believe it, her new husband actually thanked me, right after they were married, for divorcing such a lovely and kind lady so that now he could shower her with the love she truly deserved.

What a schmuck!

By Jackie Adams
CNN

ATLANTA, Georgia (CNN) — From the outside, Bill McGahan looked like he lived a pretty good life.

Bill McGahan says he felt horrible, had no energy and snored loudly when he weighed 225 pounds.

He had a great marriage, four beautiful children and a great job in real estate. But the truth of the matter was he felt horrible.

McGahan, who was in his mid-40s, was overweight at 225 pounds. He could barely fit into his clothes; he snored loudly and didn’t have the energy to play with his then 12-year-old daughter and 8-year-old triplets.

Bad eating habits, alcohol and a sedentary lifestyle had caught up with McGahan, who said he began to realize he could no longer eat the way he used to in college.

"I was on the see-food diet: What you see is what you eat," said McGahan. "Tons of carbs, pasta, pizza, steak, fries … all the good stuff."

McGahan knew he needed to change his eating and exercise habits, but he wasn’t getting the results he wanted at the gym. There also was something more important than losing weight — he wanted to be healthy enough to play baseball and spend quality time with his kids.

He hated working out, so instead of focusing on diet and fitness — he decided to set another goal.

Click here for the rest of the father daughter story and video…

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But she kind of gets him back…

From myfoxlubbock - go to the story directly:

Last Edited: Friday, 28 Mar 2008, 2:43 AM GMT

Created: Thursday, 27 Mar 2008, 10:13 PM GMT

03/27/2008  – 

A 10-year-old Nebraska girl with terminal brain cancer had a simple last wish: to have her dad by her side as she lay on her death bed.

On Wednesday, seemingly against all odds, Jayci Yaeger’s wish came true.

Her father, Jason Yaeger, who has been locked up in a South Dakota federal prison on methamphetamine charges, was allowed to see his daughter for what may be the last time.

He was furloughed after a barrage of letters and phone calls from around the country convinced officials to let him visit the hospital, according to KETV.com.

Jayci, who cannot speak, move or eat, could sense that her father was next to her and feel his touch, because she began breathing more heavily during his visit, the family told FOX News.

But to their disappointment, the visit lasted only about 30 minutes.

"She wants her dad. She goes to her room crying because she wants her dad," Jayci’s mom, Vonda Yaeger, told KETV before the prison warden agreed to permit Jason to see his daughter.

The girl’s condition has been described as minute-to-minute, and she recently suffered a stroke.

Vonda Yaeger said Jayci went into respiratory distress three times on Thursday.

Jason Yaeger has been behind bars for almost five years, and has battled drug addiction. He is scheduled to be released to a halfway house in August.

Click here to read more on this story from KETV.com.

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http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/03/20/earlyshow/main3953431.shtml

March 20, 2008

(CBS) Ten-year-old Jayci Yaeger is dying of brain cancer, and has one final wish — to have her father spend some time at her bedside before she dies.  She’s in a Lincoln, Neb. hospice.

However, her father, Jason Yaeger, is in a federal minimum security prison in South Dakota, serving five-and-a-half years for a drug conviction. He has less than a year left in his sentence, and is set to be released to a halfway house in four months.

Jason and the Yaeger family have appealed many times to the warden for a 30-day supervised release, which could be allowed under "extraordinary circumstances." However, the family says these appeals have been denied, and the prison tells them the circumstances are not "extraordinary."

"She’s very scared," Jayci’s mother, Vonda Yaeger says, "and I think she’s holding on for her father. She didn’t do anything wrong. He was there for her when she was born. He should be there for her when she goes."
Jason, she says, was always a very good father to Jayci.

The Early Show had an exclusive interview with Vonda on Thursday. Click here to see the interview.
Vonda said "the tumors are growing and hemorrhaging, and right now there’s nothing they can do for her, just keep her comfortable," reports CBS News affiliate KMTV in Omaha, Neb. "She’s very scared, and I think she’s holding on for her father."

KMTV’s Michelle Bandur reports that the family says they’ll keep fighting to get Jason out to grant his little girl’s last wish. "She didn’t do anything wrong. He was there for her when she was born. He should be there for her when she goes."

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Honey, don’t worry - he will NOT leave you at the altar!

By Mark Hebert

Yesterday, while watching the DoodleBops with my daughter, I came to the realization that I’m no longer cool and the things that I used to think are cool are definitely lame.

Every father realizes, that at a certain age, your daughter will no longer look at you as a superhero but rather a dweeb-nut, but at the age of 34, I didn’t think it would happen to “me” so soon.

As the DoodleBops ended with their signature tune, a song so catchy and annoying that once it’s running through my head it makes my scalp bleed and the wax in my ears bubble, and after the credits rolled, on came a commercial pushing a Tigger doll.

Sophia, my nearly-three-year-old daughter, loves Pooh and his posse, and out of the entire group she LOVES Tigger more than the rest.

The speed, at which Sofia shot off the couch to directly in front of the Television was alarming and made me wish mankind, could harness that energy. She started dancing a jig reminiscent of Sammy Davis Jr., if Sammy wore shoes three sizes too small and on the wrong feet.

Her arms shot into the air, her hands balled into tiny little fists, and as she shucked and jived the song coming from the television knocked the wind out of me.

dahhhh nana nut, nah nut, nah nut…

The song washed over me along with the image of a singer in tight leather pants, gaudy black hair extensions and knee-high boots doing the Electric Slide through my mind.

Tigger, the lovable little orange and black-striped ball of energy that my daughter adores was doing cartwheels…

Shaking his furry little rump….

Grinding to music coming from the speaker lodged somewhere in his-made-in-China body, which was clearly…

Super Freak! By Rick James.

Oh mama, say it ain’t so.

She’s a very freaky girrrrlllllll…nah nut nah nut…the kind you don’t take home to muthaaa!!!!

Rick’s voice came to me like the Ghost of Hipness Passed,

…and she’ll never let your spirits daaooowwwwn….when you get ‘er off the street oww!

PISS THE BED.

Anyone who knows of Rick James, or the song by the 80’s madman, knows that the self proclaimed “King of Funk” was (he died August 6, of 2005 of a heart attack) about as far from Walt Disney – or anything wholesome – as you can get.

He served prison time, was known to try to live-up to his bad boy reputation by forcing tons of depressants and stimulants into his body and he once sang a song so eloquently about a little green girl named Mary Jane.

In two words – when I knew I was cool – my hero.

This is the end…my only friend….the end…

Shut up Morrison….I thought to myself, ‘don’t need you chimin’ in on this one’.

If Rick James’ songs can be bought by Disney, have those songs used to sell cute little toys… and I have no problem with the institution that is Disney, in fact I am always open to the idea of comp tickets to sway my particular opinion…

What’s next?

Jerry Falwell endorsing Hustler magazine as a good bathroom read?

Cosby and Snoop Dogg in a Puddin’ Pop commercial with a stack hill of empty containers behind them as they both giggle their way through their lines?

On a personal front I was crushed.

Sophia continued to rumba as I became one with my sofa and watched as Disney’s Tumble Time Tigger was making a mockery of my past.

“Dance it up little girl,” I told her. “Soon you’ll be so embarrassed by me that you may never know joy again.”

I fought the urge to go to my closet, grab every pair of jeans I own and iron them.

I could hear the black socks calling me from my sock drawer begging me to wear them covered only by sandals….

As I prepared a glass of warm milk to calm myself down, I could imagine the tattoo on my chest washed away by the never ending streams of “World’s Greatest Dad” t-shirts that would soon be part of my wardrobe.

Could Florida be far off?

Should I end my subscription to Esquire and sign up for Readers Digest?

Change the info on my TiVo so that it records ‘Matlock’ instead of ‘Jon Daily’?

Out with Metallica! In with Medleys!

When the songs of a drug abusing, womanizing, foul-mouthed P-Funk god are used in the creation of toys that makes my daughter scream like Louey Anderson is standing on her hand every time we pass it in Target, I’m doomed!

No longer cool as I thought I was…now it’s time to grow up.

I would write more but I think my arthritis is kicking in and 20/20 is starting soon.

It’s nearly 7:58 p.m., way past the early-bird special and my bedtime…

In fact, it’s the official time of death, of cool.

Here is something a bit serious. 

Several artists (Billy Joel, Goo Goo Dolls, Montgomery Gentry, etc.) have gotten together and recorded a CD honoring the troops.  It can be downloaded by following the link below.

Thank you for your service and sacrifice for our country! 

We salute you!